Falling Out of Focus Read online

  “beautiful”

  “name.”

  Again, the queens spoke in broken sentences, but the reason remained unknown. Sometimes they carried out complete thoughts, while others were choppy and oddly child-like.

  “Creative.”

  “Outgoing.”

  “Uncertainty.”

  “The trinity surrounds her.”

  “Such blessings to be counted in threes.”

  “I don’t understand. What does that mean? Where am I? And why is this all happening?” I asked as I ran my fingers through my hair. “I appreciate your kindness and all, but what is going on?”

  “Chosen.”

  “The aura surrounding you declares it.”

  “The color of your locks will now afford you safekeeping, not only for the fact that pink is our royal creed, but because you yourself share the gift.”

  “The gift?” I stammered. “What gift?”

  “Clairaudience.”

  “Have you not already heard voices speaking to you?”

  I stared at the queens blankly.

  “The voice who told you to breathe?” the one queen said with a slight tilt of her head. “When you were drowning?”

  Tears welled in my eyes. “Yes, I remember. I thought it was my own voice begging me to save myself.”

  “No.”

  “You are here because you have something to learn.”

  “The only way for you to return is to accept.”

  “To move forward.”

  “To carry the weight of the burden you bear.”

  “The pink is to remind you of the place you must get back to.”

  “For the place you are in now is bleak.”

  “Let it not go from black to white, for then all will be lost.”

  Now, tears were streaming down my face. How could they know I carried a burden and needed to heal? This was insane. I had officially lost my mind. Total “white jacket, white room” moment. All I needed now was a bouncy floor beneath my feet and it would all be over.

  “Novaleigh.”

  “Oliver will be your guide. He will show you the way.”

  “Trust and faith have left you.”

  “He will help guide you back to them.”

  “Blessings to you on your journey.

  “For now we must go.”

  “But...” I tried to protest, but in a flash they were gone.

  I stood there crying for a few moments before I realized Winston and Oliver were still with me. I abruptly swiped my eyes and turned to look at them.

  “Oliver was it?” The otter gave a clipped nod. “Where to first?”

  Oliver looked over at Winston then back at me. “I am to guide you, but you are to choose the path.”

  I shook my head and whispered, “Of course I am.” I looked around and tried to decide the best route to take. I hadn’t noticed it before, but there seemed to be sections or quadrants with paths running along each one. I watched as a handful of autumn hued leaves rustled past my feet and towards a forest of deciduous trees in varying stages of change. To the left of that was a path covered in a blanket of white, untouched and unsullied; just looking at it sent a chill up my spine. The other two paths were bathed in sunlight with brightly hued flowers rustling as a breeze kissed their leaves.

  “Might I suggest something?” Winston offered, his tone more subdued and less critical than it had previously been. “Choose the direction your heart is pulling you towards. That will be the one you are meant to begin with.”

  My hands were shaky, and I could feel myself wanting to crawl into a ball and cry until I was able to snap out of this––whatever this was––but I knew that wasn’t going to happen. I was going to have to see this through if I wanted my sanity to return. Onward and upward.

  “I’d like to go that way,” I said as I pointed towards the leafless trees in the distance.

  Chapter Three

  Oliver and I had walked for what seemed like miles, and yet we still had not reached the clearing where I’d hope to start my journey. When I chose the destination, it didn’t look much more than a block away, and yet as my legs began to burn from the descent down the hill, I realized it wasn’t as close as I thought.

  “How far away is this place?”

  “Cadent? Roughly a half days journey, why?”

  “Really? It didn’t seem that far away.”

  “Illusory, mistress. All things here in Sacrife are. Always changing and growing. It is a way for us to remain safe from the things that threaten to destroy us.”

  “Destroy you? I don’t understand. This place is perfect and free. What could possibly destroy what the queens rule over?” I asked as if any of this was making sense. I wanted so desperately to wake from this dream/nightmare, but until I did, I assumed it was best to play along. Follow it through to its end, even if the end is the finale. Acceptance.

  “As in all life, there must be balance. Light to dark. Good to bad. Earth to Sky. You get my point. Sacrife is no different, Novaleigh. So far, you’ve only encountered things associated with the light, but before you know it we will run into the others, the tricksters. You will need to take heed and not be drawn into their deceptions, understand?” Oliver said in a stern but soft tone.

  “Sure. I guess.”

  “It will make sense when you encounter something that makes you recall our present conversation,” Oliver said as he looked towards the path we were on.

  “Are you always so serious? Your father was, and I guess that is where you learned it from, but do you ever have a moment of frivolity?”

  Oliver turned and stared at me with a look of abject horror. “Frivolity? There is no room for silliness when you are a guardian. I take my job very seriously. If I don’t––well, things can happen.”

  “Like what, Ollie?”

  Oliver’s eyes grew wide. “Excuse me, but my name is Oliver Franklin Hamilton. Do not address me so informally if you expect me to respond.”

  I pursed my lips together to stifle the laugh threatening to claim me. It’s amazing what the unconscious mind conjures when it’s in a state of trauma. An otter in clothing telling me to be formal and proper. Yeah, okay.

  Oliver stopped abruptly and stared up at me. “This is no joke. You are here for a reason. You have something to learn, and I am to be your guide and keep you safe as you travel your chosen path, but by no means am I not to be taken seriously. Do we understand one another, Ms. Darrow?”

  I swallowed hard. “Yes, Mr. Hamilton. Serious it is.” I moved to go around him but stopped short before continuing on. “On one condition.”

  “Which is?” Oliver snapped.

  “You call me Novi. It’s what my friends call me.”

  His shoulders dropped and he relaxed. “I can agree to those terms,” Oliver said as he adjusted his quiver. “But only if you continue to call me Oliver. Mr. Hamilton sounds as though my father is nearby and well, I’m not as stern as he is.” He grinned.

  We walked a bit more before either of us spoke again. This time, however, the conversation was more casual. We talked about the weather here and why sometimes a chill ran in the air despite the fact that there were rows and rows of peonies and marigolds in full bloom. Oliver explained that here, the seasons crossed one another based on the queens’ whims.

  “So this place we are headed, Cadent. Isn’t that what you called it? Why are the trees there bare and look dead when everything else seems so vibrant and alive?”

  Oliver gave me a sidelong glance before he spoke. “Cadent is its name. It means autumn or harvest. It most clearly is a season of change. Those who dwell there are in the in-between. If you linger too long, you can become trapped,” he said with a slight tick in his jaw. “I was going to tell you this when we arrived––just before we entered, but since you are asking now, I felt I should explain.”

  I nodded. “Okay. Anything else I need to know or prepare for?”

  He nodded. “You may see people or things that you want to hel
p, but it is imperative that you only observe. They are on their path, and it is not for you or I to interfere or alter. Understand?”

  “Yes.”

  Oliver pulled a looking glass out of the satchel attached to his belt and stared off into the distance. “I think this is a good place to stop and rest. We can make Cadent in two hours if we continue at the pace we’ve been going. I’m hungry, are you?”

  I hadn’t actually thought about it, but now that Oliver mentioned it, I was a little hungry. “I could eat, but the question is, what are we going to eat? It’s not like there is a restaurant nearby.”

  “A what?”

  I shook my head. “Never mind.”

  “Over here looks like a good place,” Oliver said as he pointed to a clearing with two tree stumps covered in moss.

  I watched as he pulled a cord from under his shirt. A cord carrying a large clear crystal wrapped in some kind of vine. He held it towards the sun and a dozen or so rays of light beamed towards the clearing. Within seconds, the stumps became stools and a round table appeared covered in bowls and goblets, all on glinting display. He turned to look at me. “What do you think?”

  My mouth hung agape. What was I supposed to say? “How did you do that?”

  Oliver grinned. “Magic of course. What else would it be?”

  He didn’t wait for me to respond, instead he trotted off towards the table and lifted the covers to reveal the fruits in one bowl and a variety of nuts in the other. As he reached for one, he turned to look at me. “I don’t think you’ll like these, but I’ll be happy to share,” he said as he lifted the lid on the last container. Inside was a variety of seafood––clams, mussels, sea urchins, snails, and a few small fish, eyes and all.

  I scrunched my nose. “I think I’m good. That is all you, my friend.”

  He gave a broad smile and dished out a hearty portion for himself. “I didn’t know your specific taste, so I started with something simple. Would you prefer something besides the fruits and nuts?”

  “Maybe some cheese? I really love apples, cheese, and walnuts.”

  Oliver nodded, and with a few choice words as he held up the crystal, a plate full of cheese arrived on my side of the table.

  “Thank you,” I said as I took the seat opposite him. It wasn’t much really, but it was perfect. The food was wonderful, and before I could even request it, Oliver called out for drinks and the most delicious concoction appeared before us. It looked like a thick dark wine, but it tasted like a modified version of a piña colada. Fresh pineapples, creamy coconut, and dark sweet cherries, all smoothly blended but without any alcohol. I was literally in love with each sip and drank at least three goblets full by the time the meal had ended.

  “For having arrived out of thin air, this meal was divine, Oliver,” I said with a grin.

  Oliver puffed out his chest and tucked his bound crystal into his satchel. “It was nothing, honest.”

  “Well, it was most appreciated. I now have the energy to carry on to Cadent.”

  “We will be there before sundown and should have enough time to find shelter before the dark settles in.”

  I nodded and followed as Oliver made his way back onto the path. The closer we got to Cadent, the more vivid the scenery became. The sky was a brilliant mix of orange and gold, while the spindly trees created an eerie foreground. As we got closer, Oliver stopped.

  “What is it?”

  “I need to make you aware of this place and the things you may encounter,” Oliver said as he pulled a large bag out of his satchel.

  “How big is that bag? You certainly have a lot in it.”

  He shook his head in disregard. “It carries all I need it to carry, Novi. Things we may need on our journey. I couldn’t pack everything, but I planned for the obvious of course.”

  “Of course.” I smiled. “So what is it you need to tell me about?” Just as I spoke, a giddy sound of laughter echoed through the trees. “What was that?”

  Oliver adjusted his glasses and reached into the pouch he was carrying. “That was part of what I needed to tell you about.” He pulled out a handful of purple flower buds and then the crystal he used earlier to make our meal appear. “I’ll explain in a moment. Right now I need to ready myself for their arrival.”

  “Whose arrival?” Another round of high pitched laughter rang out, but this time it was accompanied by the rustling of the autumn hued maple leaves scattering all around. The leaves danced as a gentle breeze blew. Oliver worked faster to call forth whatever he needed before the leaves settled back onto the ground again. In one hand Oliver held the buds and in the other a small glass pitcher of what looked like milk. “What is that for?” I snapped.

  Oliver didn’t answer, instead he took a knee and bowed his head. “Do as I do, and I’ll explain later,” he whispered.

  I, too, bent down and bowed towards the entrance to Cadent, waiting and wondering why all of this was necessary. Again, wondering why this dream I was stuck in was so incredibly unusual. I sighed and waited. A heartbeat later my answer arrived.

  “You wish to enter?” A deep voice spoke only a few feet away.

  “We do,” Oliver said as he held out the offerings.

  “You may rise, Sir Hamilton.”

  Oliver stood, and the tension I had in my shoulders eased. While this whole situation was peculiar, I found myself full of anxiety. Who was this person that Oliver had to bow to, I wondered? When I looked up I saw nothing. Oliver cleared his throat and flicked his head towards the ground. There before us was a tiny man with thorny wings covered in a gossamer leaf. I stared in disbelief as the overly small creature sheathed his sword.

  “Are you going to introduce me to your guest, Sir Hamilton?”

  Oliver stammered a bit, then recovered. “This is Miss Novaleigh Darrow. She is an honorary guest of the queens as you can see by her hair.”

  “Pleased to meet you, Miss Darrow. It’s an honor to have you here in Cadent,” he said with a tilt of his head.

  “And you are?” I replied.

  “Mabellio. Warrior leader of the Autumn Fae and direct council to Golar the Golden Queen.”

  I looked over at Oliver, hoping to gather some sort of insight, but he was just standing there, looking out at the thirty some odd little fairies who had appeared out of nowhere and were now bowing before me. I didn’t know what to say or do, so instead I smiled.

  “We request permission to travel through your land,” Oliver asked as he put his hand in his pocket and pulled out a nugget of silver. “We’d like to offer payment in advance if you will accept us.”

  Mabellio stepped forward to accept the chunk of silver. “Golar will be pleased. Thank you for the offering. You may enter, but be forewarned that there are travelers among us who may be less than desirable. Some have been trapped, while others still roam. We shall catch them soon enough, and our watchers will keep an eye out as you journey on.”

  “Your kindness is appreciated. We will take heed of your warning,” Oliver replied.

  “Safe travels my friend,” Mabellio said as he pulled out a handful of dirt and blew it into the air. A smoky cloud wafted into the sky and illuminated an entrance that was previously hidden. “You may enter.”

  Oliver reached for my hand and together we entered Cadent.

  “I’ll explain when we find shelter. Until then just follow me.”

  I sighed and followed.

  Chapter Four

  We didn’t have to go far before we reached our intended destination. I was tired, hungry, and quite frankly over all the mysticism that was constantly surrounding me. Everywhere I turned, something was alive and moving about in a hurried yet calm fashion. Daily life for the creatures and things that lived in Cadent, I supposed, but until I could ask Oliver, I was forced to assume, and we all know what assuming does for you.

  “It’s just up those stairs. Follow me,” Oliver said as he walked towards an arched stone wall with steps running up the side. The whole thing looked as though it
had, at one time or another, been part of a larger structure, but now looked as if it may fall down at any moment.

  “Oliver,” I snapped as I stopped short of the first step. “There is nothing at the top of this and even if there was, I doubt those stairs can hold my weight. This can’t possibly be where we are going.”

  “But it is Novi, and it will hold your weight. Before this land became home to the Autumn Fae, it was a place where humans like yourself used to dwell. They built them. What is still standing will more than carry your size.”

  I huffed. “Maybe so then, but those stone steps still lead to nothing. It just drops off.”

  “Faith, Novi. Faith.”

  Oliver was halfway up the stairs to nowhere when he stopped to wave me on. With each step I took, the scenery changed behind it. The moss covered stone began to glint in the sun’s setting glow, and lightening bugs began to brighten our way in the dusk. At the top, there was an arched wooden door with a copper handle and a sign that read Welcome.

  “Where did that come from, Oliver?” I huffed.

  He laughed and turned the handle. “Our respite for the night, mistress.”

  I ducked through the small doorway, expecting to have to crawl around on the inside. But as with everything else in this land, the height of the door was misleading. Instead of the tiny space I’d imagined, there was a multi-level home with quaint furnishings and golden lanterns that twinkled as candle flames danced within.

  I turned to Oliver as he removed his quiver and bow, hanging them on the hook beside the door and asked, “Is everything in Cadent magical?”

  “Everything in Sacrife is magical, Novi. Nothing is as it seems. You must remember this.”

  “Well, quite frankly, I’m still wondering when I am going to wake up from this insane dream. I know none of this is real,” I said as I plopped down on a couch near the fireplace and closed my eyes.

  Oliver laughed a full-on belly laugh as he made his way towards the kitchen. “This is no dream, Novi. Everything you are experiencing is real and until you accept that, you will not be able to go home.”

  “Yeah, okay. Sure. Twin queens, talking otters, Autumn Fae, houses suspended in midair. Yep, totally real. Got it.”